Introducing the first ADHD Couple Therapy professional guide, Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy: Clinical Interventions.
The goal? Nothing short of a revolution. Training couple therapists. Teaching couples. Online. And in-person workshops. Check out ADHD Success Training.
After four years researching, collaborating, and writing, it’s here.
Why ADHD Couple Therapy?
For 17 years, thousands of reader e-mails detailed their personal relationship challenges to me. The same for thousands of detailed posts in the discussion group I’ve led for years. As a result, I’ve heard a shocking number of ADHD couple-therapy-gone wrong stories. The conflict. The strife. The hurt and confusion. Upset children. The futility. Ach.
As my Italian momma would say, “Basta!” (Enough!)
Years ago, in my own marriage, my husband (diagnosed in 1999) and I gave up on couple therapy. In fact, we shuddered at the thought of trying to “train” yet another couple therapist in ADHD—and paying for the privilege!
There we’d sit in the therapists’ office, telling our stories of domestic quasi-mayhem. Why? We desperately needed someone to help us solve our mysteriously intractable problems.
But there they’d sit, looking puzzled or bearing jaw-dropping expressions. They meant well, but they were out of their depth. You see, the typical “couples troubles” strategies didn’t apply. In fact, sometimes those strategies exacerbate a bad situation.
To avoid more painful and expensive therapy, we doubled-down on our efforts to work things out ourselves. Yet, it was a long and sharp learning curve. We both still bear some scars. The good news for you? I’ve shortened your learning curve with two highly praised books and now direct-to-consumer online training.
Until Now? Mostly Two Poor Choices
Until now, ADHD-challenged couples have mostly faced two dismal choices:
- Couple therapy that is not informed by ADHD-specific knowledge
- Adult ADHD therapy that overlooks the needs of the other partner and the relationship—and might not be evidence-based even for the adult with ADHD
As I wrote in my first book (Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.?), the wrong therapy can be worse than no therapy at all.
With our new book, we (psychologist Arthur L. Robin and I) created a model that carefully merges two sets of therapeutic approaches:
- Those proven effective for couple therapy, and
- Those proven effective for adult ADHD treatment
In other words, we based these interventions not on loosey-goosey ideas about “communication” and “be vulnerable” and “intimacy”. Instead, we combined our 50 years of professional experience with the research-based evidence about what works.
Make no mistake: We focus on the practical as well as the emotional. Both are equally important. Why? Because emotional intimacy fails to flourish (or resuscitate!) when household chores are neglected, the budget is busted, and important commitments are forgotten.
Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy™
Three times, the publisher asked me to produce a guide for mental-health professionals, for helping ADHD-challenged couples. Twice, I declined. I simply couldn’t afford even more pro bono work. Typically, it’s academics who write these professional guides. (You know, people with salaries and an expectation to publish.)
By the third request, my week had been particularly peppered with stories from too many couples struggling—despite weekly therapy. Sometimes for years! It only magnified the chorus I’d heard for 20 years.
That is to say, I weakened. I tentatively agreed—dependent upon psychologist Arthur L. Robin, PhD, agreeing to join me. We’ve co-presented at conferences for years on this topic. Bless him; he agreed. (You can read our bios here.)
Four years later, it’s here! With its debut, Routledge Press named Dr. Robin and me January Authors of the Month:
Top Experts Praise Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy
Top experts in the fields of general couple therapy and Adult ADHD have lavished praise upon this comprehensive, pragmatic guide.
These experts include psychologists Harville Hendrix, Douglas K. Snyder, Russell Barkley, and physicians Patricia Quinn, Lily Hechtman, Philip Asherson, and Martin Kutscher. Click here to read the full endorsements and learn more about these experts.
What’s Covered In Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy?
In 250 no-nonsense pages, we cover the gamut:
- Explaining the wide variety of potential issues ADHD-challenged couples face
- Zeroing in on very practical strategies
- Healing what we’ve designated the “Adult ADHD-Focused Dysfunctional Interaction Cycle”
- Working together on chores and planning, budgets, electronic addictions, and even sexual intimacy.
- Explaining how to get the best results from medication—and how couple therapists can help in the process
We are grateful to guest contributors, including psychologist J. Russell Ramsay, who developed a couple-therapy intervention based on his CBT model for ADHD.
For a quick overview, here is the 250-page book’s Table of Contents:
Section I: Adult ADHD and Relationships
- Meet the Couples and Their Common Challenges, Gina Pera
- Principles of ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy, Gina Pera
Section II: Clinical Interventions
- Psychoeducation, Arthur L. Robin, PhD
- CBT Model for ADHD-Challenged Couples, J. Russell Ramsay, PhD
- The Role of Medication, Gina Pera and Arthur L. Robin, PhD
- Behavior and Habit Change, Arthur L. Robin, PhD
- Imago Relationship Therapy Adapted for ADHD, Carol Ann Robbins, PhD
- Co-Parenting Strategies, Barbara Easterlin, PhD
Section III: Special Topics
- Money, Gina Pera
- Cyber-Addictions, Kevin Roberts, MA
- Sexual Intimacy, Gina Pera
Conclusions and Clinical Notes
For more details on the topics: The Skyrocketing Demand for ADHD Couple Therapy.
Online Training! Therapists and Consumers
Now, we are excited to be offering online training for consumers and professionals alike.
The training is soup-to-nuts training. It designed to help you, the adult with ADHD or loved one, even if you cannot find or afford appropriate therapy.
Professionals will find this training clearly detailed and step-by-step. While many clinical guides are largely narrative, this one focuses on specific interventions known critical for ADHD-challenged individuals and couples to get traction.