Adult ADHD and Partner Support Groups & Courses

Seeking support ADHD challenges—your own or a loved one’s—in the easiest way possible?  Desperate to find people who “get it”? Where you don’t have to explain every last detail and risk being mis-judged?

You’ve come to the right place!  I began in 1999 facilitating such groups—and know the ropes very well by now.

In the early 2000s, I started organizing face-to-face meetings in Palo Alto—one for adults with ADHD and one for the “partners of.” Word spread internationally.  From humble beginnings, I’ve constantly branched out with new technologies and options. Something

Leading these groups for almost 20 years has been my immense privilege and pleasure. Seeing (and reading about) strangers of all ages and socioeconomic backgrounds coming together for mutual support, strategy-sharing and much laughter restores one’s faith in humanity.

Gina’s Offerings for Adult ADHD Support and Education:

1. Adults with ADHD  Free monthly meeting (for SF Bay Area Locals Only). Sign up to be notified here.
2. Partners of Adults with ADHD — an international E-mail/web-based group.  (We also welcome parents and siblings of adults with ADHD.) A modest monthly fee. Members have the option of joining in a monthly Zoom call with their peers. Apply here
3. Everyone:   “Virtual”  Adult ADHD and Relationships Group Discussion — 16 posts right here on the ADHD Roller Coaster.  Based on chapters in Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.?  Essays written by two women in dual-ADHD marriages. The discussion comes in the comments—read and leave a comment any time. Be as long-winded as you like!  No one is getting impatient. The group is open 24-7!
4. Everyone (including professionals!): Solving Your Adult ADHD Puzzle — my online training program
5. Course Participant Group — Enrolling in Course 1 or 2 gives you access to purchase 6 group Q&A Zoom calls (I facilitate).  This is a “mixed” group. Adults with ADHD. Partners and other loved ones. Some couples attend together. Members check in from around the globe — England, Australia, South Africa and all points in the U.S.  Bonus: Includes access to initial Zoom meeting calls. (No longer being recorded.)

You’ll find more details about each resource below.

Adult ADHD Group — SF Bay Area Locals Only

COVID has restricted the longtime Palo Alto gatherings at The Friend’s Meeting House. In their place, I’ve offered a free monthly group via Zoom.

Our meetings follow no format. Think of it as a wide-ranging and supportive conversation among new and familiar friends. You might be surprised, but it works!

Please note: This is solely for residents local to the San Francisco Bay Area.

Join the mailing list (rarely more than 2 mails monthly) here.

The “Partners Of” Group: ADHD Partner…

ADHD Partner: This is hosted on groups.io platform. It is not a chat room or a discussion board. Rather, it is e-mail based (you can also read at the website).

How does it work? Simple. Send an e-mail and go about your business. Come back and read the responses.  It conforms to your schedule;

Choose to receive individual e-mails or the daily and weekly digests—or read at the site. Search the archives for key topics.

To protect the privacy of all involved,  I encourage you to use an anonymous e-mail address.

…Now Featuring ADHD Partner Zoom Groups

ADHD Partner members can now participate in group support via Zoom. This is a rare and extremely invaluable resource. Many participants say that these meetings have helped them more than years of therapy—at a tiny fraction of the cost and time investment.

Men with female ADHD Partner often are the least likely to find understanding, from professionals and family/friends alike. That’s why I created a Zoom group just for you.

To join in, you’ll first need to be a member of ADHD Partner. After that, instructions will follow.

Other ADHD Partner Support: Books and Courses

Over 22 years, I’ve created an extensive body of work to support you in self-education—in all aspects of Adult ADHD.

1. My first book was informed in part by years of leading these groups.  It will provide the solid foundation you need to start healing your life and your relationship—and to be a savvier mental healthcare consumers:  Is it You, Me, or  Adult A.D.D.? Stopping the Roller Coaster When Someone You Love Has Attention Deficit Disorder). Available in audiobook.
2. My second (co-authored) book created the first clinical guide for Adult ADHD couple therapy based on the evidence of what works for Adult ADHD and for couple therapy: Adult ADHD-Focused Couple Therapy: Clinical Interventions
3. My new course provides what we should find in individual and couple therapy for ADHD — but so rarely do. At an affordable price and with opportunities for peer camaraderie via Zoom. For more info: Solving Your Adult ADHD Puzzle
4. Note: I recently launched Course 2 – on optimizing ADHD issues with sleep and medication. You might be surprised at what your physician doesn’t know.

Please note regarding my first book’s title:  It was published in 2008—though all the information is “evergreen” and found nowhere else.  At that time, the public still knew ADHD as Attention Deficit Disorder.

You, Me, and ADHD — Virtual Discussion Group

Finally, I’ve created another free online resource:  the ADHD Virtual Discussion Group. What’s virtual about it? It’s not a group per se but you can read and join in the comments as if it were! On your own time.

This is a collection of 16 essays, each based on one chapter in my first book. You are invited to read and share your perspectives in the comments section.

I am particularly proud of this series and the writers behind it.  Why? Because from the very beginning, I’ve never seen ADHD relationship issues as an issue of “ADHD vs. Non-ADHD”. In fact, I’ve often found that narrative harmful.

Instead of paving the way toward solutions, the “ADHD vs. Non-ADHD” view sets up a false dichotomy and ready-made conflict. Rather than recognizing that poorly managed ADHD affects all of life—not just a person’s “relationships”—it implies that the only challenge is the “relationship dynamic.”  Come on…..

Instead of seeing each couple as unique, it over-simplifies their challenges in a way that’s more useful to marketing than the couples themselves.

ADHD is a highly variable syndrome. Moreover, it is only one aspect of personality. Yes, there are common challenges.  Let’s acknowledge them. But these people are not clones. And, neither are their partners.  Each couple is unique—and guess what? Some couples are dual-ADHD!

When ADHD adversely affects, in varying degrees, that adult’s education, employment, driving skills, temper, parenting consistency, substance use, sleep, health, and many other “domains of life,” that has an impact on the partner or spouse and the children. No amount of “couple communication” training is going to address these systemic challenges. Instead, these individuals and couples need solid and joint ADHD education, support, and evidence-based strategies.

…With Essays Written by Women in Dual-ADHD Marriages

That’s why I feel so fortunate to have recruited two clever friends familiar with the broad spectrum of potential ADHD challenges to write these essays:  Taylor J. (pseudonym) and Jaclyn Paul (who blogs at The ADHD Homestead).

Both women:

• Are excellent, thoughtful writers
• Were diagnosed with ADHD later in life
• Are mothers to children diagnosed with ADHD
• Are married to men with late-diagnosis ADHD
• Naturally have a parent (or two) with ADHD
• As I said, covering ADHD from all the angles

You can begin reading here:  Chapter 1: Adult ADHD Myths and Facts

I look forward to welcoming you!

—Gina Pera, course creator and group leader